Britjojo - I'm so sorry that your ex keeps coming up! But hopefully you'll be able to flush him out of your system sooner rather than later as you continue to vent about him until there's nothing left in you but total indifference!
The key ingredient to "fighting fair"? Maturity! So I don't think your ex qualifies, Britjojo, so he deserves no apologies! But now you've thrown a dart way off target and hopefully your next dart thrown (only when you're fully healed and ready to try again) will land closer to your bullseye - your true center.
I just need to add here that I'm certainly not perfect when it comes to relationships, and that I learned the hard way... almost ending up separating from my husband a few years ago after an extremely rocky beginning (years 2 - 5) of our eight years together. But we climbed our way out of that mess - with much therapeutic help - and we're stronger now and even more in love than ever before. I also need to add that raising demanding little ones, dealing with my own post-partum blues after both pregnancies, and just not having time together really was tough on us.
I also must give a lot of credit to all the authors and poets I've read, the wise elders and my therapist to whom I listened...for teaching me a lot and shaping my view of love - including loving yourself. Much of what I write here is regurgitated from what I learned from others, even from a number of customers I waited on when I worked in various restaurants, retail stores, etc.
Last but not least, I do want to share one of the most wonderful books of all time that I keep on my bedstand along with other favorites (like my beloved Shakespeare). It's called "The Prophet" by Kahlil Gibran. I was introduced to it when I took a Philosophy of Education course in college. Boy did Gibran teach me a lot - about raising children and marriage mostly. If you can, take a look at an excerpt on Amazon or borrow it from your local library. Another life-changing book for me is "Man's Search for Meaning" by Viktor Frankl, a Holocaust survivor who became a reknowned psychiatrist.
Has anyone else read any life-changing books lately?
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