[oregongal]

Let me first say that I have been married for 31 years and it takes a lot to keep a marriage strong and to make it last!

Commitment is number 1 in my book. Yes, phone sex is cheating! But I certainly wouldn't automatically give up on the guy! There's a lot more to the story that needs to be uncovered.

If he is willing to admit it and talk about it then there might be a chance that he wants to make amends. People do make mistakes and if a person is committed to someone (like when you vow to love each other till death do you part...)then you need to try and work things out.

I can't really go into that much detail here but you need to look at the big picture. Do you want to end the relationship forever or is it a quality relationship worth saving? Only the wife can really say if her husband is a good man or this is only one more reason that you have to call him a jerk.

If there are children, you really need to decide if it's worth saving so your children won't be without a father. If the guy is wanting to be forgiven and make things right that says a lot.

Of course, counseling should be considered important so you can work together to find out why he felt like he needed to do that in the first place. Maybe both parties need to work on their relationship and how to get closer - physically, romantically and deepen their commitment to each other and making things work.

I hope I didn't ramble on too much. I really believe in the sanctity of marriage. Everyone goes through rough times and they can make your relationship stronger.