thanks for the kind words everyone. I had a hard time coming back in here. I signed on once a few days ago but couldnt post. see, this is very difficult for me. I am VERY embarrassed about what happened. I am certainly not proud of it, and I feel a large amount of guilt, shame, and sadness. I am seeing my therapist again. more often than I was before. she is really trying to get me on the right path. the good part is, she really cares, and has got my family involved in the healing process as well. I wish I could wipe away the past and erase what I did. I was so overwhelmed with guilt and sorrow after I got the STD from the valentines day date. I have spoke to Cameron about all this and he feels terrible. he knew he had the STD and didnt tell me. he was on a dry streak and wanted a quick piece of fun. I was stupid enough to fall into it. Cameron isnt a bad person at all, he just made a bad choice. he let his libido do the thinking. I dont mean to sound gross, but I really think men with very active sex drives need to work off some of that energy manually.
I am starting to get off the path now. I just feel very damaged now. Like I am worthless and completely undesireable. The STD issue is under control and its basically just an emotional issue now. Its not an easy process for sure. I am working hard on getting my life back together. I look forward to being a part of the fun here again. I dont know how often I will be here, but I will try to check in with all my purse lovin Gal pals.
thanks again for the kind words girls. I love you all.