Would You Take Back a Cheater?

[etali]

This is just hypothetical, but if your guy was cheating on you, would you forgive them if they came clean? What about if they said they wanted to leave you for the other person, then changed their mind and said 'Sorry, I really want you....'

I don't think I could ever forgive a cheat, but I've known people who have, and their relationships are now stronger than ever.

[britjojo]

I would never and could never. Quite apart from the fact that I think that cheaters are incapable of being faithful, I would forever resent the fact that he risked bringing home who knows what disease to me, and hence my daughter too.

No, screw around on me and you're gone.

[etali]

I'm not sure if I agree they're incapable of ever being faithful, but I do think that if they've cheated in your relationship, then the risk is there they'll cheat again in that relationship, if that makes any sense.

I wanted to cheat on my ex - I came really close to doing it, but I finally got the guts to dump him before entering a new relationship. So I think sometimes cheating is a symptom of a bad relationship, not just heartlessness.

[elaine130]

I agree, Etali, that cheating is a symptom of a much larger problem in a relationship. If my husband cheated on me once and came clean to me... I'd consider marriage therapy but I would probably separate from him for awhile and really think things through. If my husband was cheating and I found out about it - oooh we'd definitely separate and maybe in a year I'd consider marriage counseling and then who knows if we'd get back, depends on what's issues have been worked out, if at all. If either of the aforementioned happened and we got back together but he cheated again, even just once and even if he came clean... then I would be DONE with him and I'd ask for a divorce.

[kitsch_k]

i think i can forgive a cheater but i guess things are never going to be the same. i can never look at that person the same way.

[angelthelson]

for me NO! once a cheater, always a cheater!!

[dreamr802]

I could never take back a cheater, that would hurt me so much that he could do that and probably the other girl didn't want anything long term or something so that's why he had to come crawling back.

[skyqueen]

You can TRY to forgive...but the trust is gone. That little voice, in the background, late at night, will never let you forget.

[lcsamano]

Skyqueen, I agree you can try but there will always be a trust issue. I am not sure if I would take back a cheater. It would really be hard to.